NO PICKET FENCES

Before and after room makeover.

It was time to make it reflect me and not my mother or anyone else.

Don’t mind the laundry, garbage and movies on the floor - finally finishing up cleaning.

Makes me diiiiiiiiie laughing every time. (:

(Source: swifgrons)

(Source: theplushbear)

straightupswede:

Single Ladies - Burt Hummel (3x22 Graduation)

no more, no less. the people i want here more than anything in the world right now. in no particular order.

jill
em
amanda (c)
jay
lee
liv
amy
sarah
minday
sawyer
carly
julia

twelve people. 8 posse, 2 dunners, 2 not.

hate this.

hate being here.

hate being alone.

my chest hurts.

love you guys. :’(

idk

just want my friends

all alone sucks

being all alone with HER is even worse

never realized what a wretched child I am

thank god she’s here to tell me

116 days

15 weeks 1 day

miserable

I need to stop crying and sleep

fuck

not functioning very well

miss everyone

don’t want to be here

really need to not be alone right now

oh well

whats a girl to do

fuck everything

So. My mom basically told me what my plans were tonight. I had to fix her computer (which technically, everything but the monitor belongs to me. I’m the one who got it for Christmas four years ago from my brother). She decided it was time I did it for her.

Basic To-Do List:
- Delete all my “crap” from the computer including programs, files, etc.
- Then update all of the software (because she couldn’t press a button and do it herself).
- Then download Google Chrome.
- Then fix the keyboard that she broke.
- Then fix the speakers.

I was going to delete all of my files off of the computer anyway. They took up a lot of room, I have duplicates saved on my laptop, and basically it was all garbage. And I was going to get rid of all of my programs that she couldn’t/didn’t use, such as Youtube Downloader, Jasc Paint Shop Pro 9, Animation Studio, WinZip, Video Converter, iTunes, etc. Anything that I used to use or have on my laptop now, basically.

So I did. Got rid of everything.

She is so SO FUCKING computer illiterate, though. I cannot even begin to describe how many shit programs she had managed to install. All from like game sites, etc. She is so fucking lucky she didn’t download a virus, because she honestly had no idea she had downloaded them. Tried to say I did it. Like hell I did - I know what programs I install on my baby, I’m not retarded. Plus I tracked them by creation and location dates/times. All her. But whatever. I didn’t comment or bring it up again. So much garbage, though.

I updated all of her software, which SHE COULD HAVE DONE. One click on “yes” for each program whenever it popped up. It hasn’t been done since Christmas when I last did it. Jesus Christ. She’s computer illiterate, yes, BUT SHE KNOWS HOW TO UPDATE IT. I’ve watched her do it MANY TIMES.

This next one really pisses me the fuck off. She asked me to download Google Chrome because it’s was better than Internet Explorer and I always rave about it. So I did. Imported all of her favourites and shit in, some by hand, from IE, fixed her settings, etc. Then what does she do? COMES HOME AND FUCKING BITCHES AT ME. I’ll admit, I was getting frustrated with her, so I snapped a fair bit, but she was being idiotic. Bitched at me about her homepage, favourites, the layout, setup, the fact that it wasn’t what she wanted anymore, etc. Quote: “I don’t like change.” THEN DON’T FUCKING ASK ME TO CHANGE IT. All she had to do was be patient and let me put all the settings to what she wanted them, which I told her. BUT NO NO. She felt the need to bitch me out for doing exactly what she asked me to do. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. Not fucking fair. I don’t deserve the abuse. I’m a shitty person, but not shitty enough to deserve this.
Update - Started talking her through it, and she got madder. Told her I’d change it back to IE and she flipped again. OH! And she says she didn’t put half the shit in her favourites in there. I was like “Well they don’t magically save. You have to manually do it” and she bitched me out because she “DIDN’T DO IT DAMNIT”. Fuck right off.

She fucked up the keyboard. I thought I had it fixed. Didn’t. No idea what she did, I think I’ll uninstall and reinstall it tomorrow. She swears it’s a fucking virus. It’s not. She fucked up.

Fixed the speakers. Just had to get the computer to realize they were plugged in. They were working though, she just freaked and said they weren’t because the computer kept asking her which plug they were plugged in to (which she knew, and could click easily).

I’m beat. It’s fucking Friday. I want to get away from here. I don’t want to take this the rest of the weekend. At least it only started end of Saturday last weekend. Fuck.

I tried to do something nice (after she ordered me to do it). I didn’t put up a fuss or bitch or anything. And this is the thanks I get. Like.. she doesn’t even need to thank me. I don’t even care about that - I’d do it anyway. But I don’t deserve to be bitched at. Not like this. I hate it.

(Source: mcavoys)

I sincerely, honestly, truly hope that I never have to tell someone that there’s nothing I can do; they’re not going to make it.

I know in my chosen career path that it’s a foolish hope, one that’ll probably be dashed during my first year in practice if not during my residency.

But at this point in my life I wish, hope and pray that I’ll never have to tell someone (regardless of age) that they are going to die regardless of what I do. Because that in itself is dashing all of THEIR hopes, and I would never ever consider doing so if there were any other option..